Style or Consumption? What My Favorite Outfits Say About My Personal Style
“Did I love it or was I influenced?” Welcome to my new series!
Fashion is in some ways what’s given to you. Style is what you do with it.” - Monica L. Miller.
I mull over this question often: “What have I done with the fashion that’s been given to me?”
Back in April, someone asked me to describe my style in a few words. We were filming a TikTok segment and I was to answer on camera. “Refined. Maximalist. Eclectic,” I quickly blurted out. My interviewer nodded in agreement and I smiled, but inside, I was having an intense style check-in.
“Refined?” I thought, anyone can say that—how unimaginative! Maximalist? On Google: “a style that embraces bold colors, intricate patterns, and a ‘more is more’ philosophy, contrasting with the simplicity of minimalism.” Indeed, I love (and often wear) bold colors and intricate patterns but much to my chagrin, my day-to-day style leans very normcore (think jorts and a tank in the summer or jeans and a plain sweater in the winter). What does this say about me? Eclectic? Drawing from different sources of inspiration. At least that part was true as my style is strongly influenced by Japanese deconstruction, African craftsmanship, European glamour and American sportswear.
Still, the question haunts me and it’s mainly because I haven’t fully reconciled the work that I do as a fashion creator with what I know to be my true personal style. Working with brands, I am indeed “given a lot of fashion” but these head-to-toe looks often promote a prescriptive style formula that rarely accounts for my or anyone’s interiority. Yet these clothes also find their way in my closet—hanging next to pieces I bought, pieces that tell a story—painting a very confusing picture of who I am.
I am also guilty of buying vacation pieces that only look good on screen, a habit I’m committed to breaking (who else is a “recovering “Instagram-first” packer?) With these contradictions in mind, I have been on a quest to decouple my tastes from the brand-mediated, algorithm-driven, consumerist mess fashion is currently mired in. And it is as much of a spiritual journey as it is physical!
How will I know when I’ve reached my goal? When I can confidently say that my personal style exists outside of consumption. That the clothes in my closet reflect my interior world, mirror my values and…who knows…maybe even spark interesting commentary. Tall order I know but I expect this of myself as a student of fashion history and culture. I’m finding that the more you experience the world, the more you learn about yourself, the more this knowledge becomes what you fashion yourself out of. And I want my clothes to better reflect this. The goal isn’t necessarily to have a unique personal style but to buy smart, consume sustainably and have every look feel more like me.
Welcome to my new series, Style or Consumption, where I try to distill my personal style from Fashion the apparatus.
Disclosure: I will earn a commission for any purchase made from my affiliate links.
The Look: Clio Peppiatt Top, Clio Peppiatt Skirt
The occasion: My 31st birthday party
This woman is mysterious, sweet and spicy.
Thank God Clio Pepiatt thought of this green! The colorful beading made me feel like an enchanted goddess, bringing a touch of magical realism to what would have otherwise been a very regular matching set. And that’s what I’ve come to realize about my style: I’m drawn to classic silhouettes that have something extra—an unexpected color, a scalloped edge, those wink-wink details that make you take a double look. The set is no doubt an attention grabber but the cropped length exudes a restrained sexiness and self-assured femininity that balance the glitzy glam. I live for these contradictions.
The verdict: Consumption
I fear it’s a one-hit wonder that isn’t as suitable for daytime wear.
The Look: Magda Butrym Dress
The occasion: 10-year anniversary dinner
This woman will read a book at a bar and only put it down if you are better company.
There’s something disarming about this Magda Butrym dress. The magic is in the two-tone double layer, which is intriguing and heavy on sex appeal. To me, minimalism is at its best when it’s combined with smart design, and I’m ultimately drawn to smart design. There is a black and pink version on sale that I also like, but by now you probably know how much I love the color green.
The verdict: Style
This is a dress I would wear to a wedding, date night, a gala, and so many more occasions. Definitely a keeper that looks as good today as it will in a decade.
The Look: Diotima Bralette and Christopher Esber Skirt
The occasion: NYCXCLOTHES 10-year anniversary dinner
This woman is the life of the party (the island girl popped out in this one).
Texture matching is one of my favorite forms of play, and if no one had thought of wearing these two pieces together before, consider it a party look that passes the vibe check. I retired from the club scene a long time ago but I still love a feral night every now and then, and these pieces are made to dance.
The verdict: Style and Consumption
If the skirt wasn’t see-through, it would be a fun closet piece that I could wear with a button-down shirt or tank during the day. Otherwise, I can’t have my cheeks out unless I’m lounging poolside or partying on a boat in Jamaica.
The Look: Staud Wayfaring Dress
The occasion: My husband’s birthday dinner
This woman loves a themed party.
That day might have been the start of me wearing red. True to form, I opted for a dress with an unexpected twist: a ruched satin skirt that oozes sensuality. I loved the fit but for a $450 retail price, I wish the dress wasn’t all synthetic. It’s now on sale for $180 though.
The verdict: Consumption
I bought it on a whim and haven’t worn it again since.
The Look: Diotima Top, Stella McCartney Skirt, ALAÏA Bag
The occasion: Net-a-Porter’s NYFW Cocktail party
This woman spent the day gallery hopping then attended the cocktail party before ending the night at her fling’s place.
I felt the most me in this Diotima top that nods to her Caribbean heritage (“Personally, Diotima is my Cult Gaia”). This outfit is the truest expression of my style: textured, eccentric, seductive and glam. I pat myself on the back for not going with the easy choice: a dress. Skirts are so much harder to style, which is why I’m intent on incorporating them into my going-out wardrobe. I like that this Stella McCartney number leans more practical than dressy but styled with everything else, it’s fab!
The verdict: Style
I impatiently waited for these pieces to go on sale (they were loans), and I finally bought a version of the top for $338 on The Webster.
The Look: Loewe Skirt, Khaite Top, Jacquemus Bag
The occasion: Dinner with friends
This woman is flirty and seductive in her off-kilter skirt.
The verdict: Style
Another loan from Net-a-Porter, this proportional play will guide a lot of my styling moving forward. PS: I’ve worn these gold Reformation Wilda kitten mules to death.
Do you also find yourself wrestling with these style questions? What have you bought that was purely for consumption or for the expression of your style? What’s on your current wish list? I’d love to hear your thoughts on this series!
PS: You can find the full collection of links here.
Until next time,
Shelcy
Oh, I love this idea for a series!
The diotima look 💛💛